In reviewing my 2025 columns, I came across several that explored the humorous side of living in Hawaii. Here are some of the high points.
Dat obvious?
Gene Kaneshiro, whose father and uncle started Columbia Inn, told me about spotting some locals in Japan.
He said, “While visiting the Sensoji Shrine in Asakusa, Tokyo, we spotted two young guys munching on some taiyaki snack. In passing, I said ‘Howzit? Ono, that one?’
“And they both looked at each other and said, ‘Oh wow, we dat obvious?’ To which I responded, ‘Eh, two guys in T-shirts, Bermuda shorts and rubba slippas, walking la’dat, gotta be from Hawaii!’
“We had a nice laugh and after discovering they were Hawaiian Air stewards, we parted ways with a shaka and ‘laters.’
“We can spark dem anyplace!” said Kaneshiro.
Wat you going do laterz?
Russell Komoto said he and his wife hoped their daughter wouldn’t learn to speak pidgin when they moved to Kauai in 1975.
“We had just moved and my wife, daughter and I were eating at Lihue’s McDonald’s (it was open air at that time and had a patio dining area fronting the kitchen),” said Komoto.
“A group of teenagers arrived and one of them yelled across to a friend who was seated pretty close to us and said, ‘Aaaaaa sista, wat u going do tonight?’
“And the friend replied … ‘I dunno. Maybe go show (movies).’
“I looked up at my wife when she said, ‘I hope our daughter doesn’t learn pidgin.’
“Fast forward about 10 years, and again we’re at McDonald’s, but it is now air conditioned and the patio is enclosed. One of my daughter’s classmates yelled to her, ‘Aaaaaa Laura, wat you going do laterz?’
“And my daughter replied, ‘I dunno. Maybe bumbye we go Kukui Grove (shopping center).’
“My wife and I both looked up at each other and started laughing, remembering that encounter almost 10 years earlier. And she said, ‘I think we’ve been here toooo long.’”
He’s da kine
Deborah Emerson said, “I had a couple of wonderful pidgin experiences when I was FOB (fresh off the boat — new to Hawaii).
“Working at the Legislative Reference Bureau, I had an assignment for a senator. Of course, I was new and had no insider knowledge of the personalities or preferences of the members of the legislature.
“My boss mentioned, ‘Well … Senator X is … you know, he’s …’
“I was eager for any insights to help me best respond to the senator, and was hoping for guidance such as ‘The senator is really smart and will understand the complexities of this issue,’ or ‘You will need to explain this issue in very simple terms.’
“Instead, the great reveal about the senator was … ‘He’s da kine.’
“Later, working at the Attorney General’s office, I had a caseload of a few hundred family court cases. I had a wonderful secretary who taught me a lot and was patient with me when I struggled with pidgin.
“I was unable to locate a file in response to a call, so I asked my secretary if she had that file. Her reply? ‘No mo.’
“I thought that meant she didn’t have that file any longer. So, I said, ‘Where did it go?’
“Her reply: ‘No mo.’
“Did you used to have it?”
“‘No.’ Finally, the light dawned and I asked, ‘So there is no file for that case?’
“Yes.”
“Whew!”
Wrong line
Columbia Inn founder Tosh Kaneshiro was walking down the street during World War II when he found a tutu lining up with servicemen to buy liquor in Chinatown.
Tosh whispered to her that the line was for a second-floor house where something quite different was on sale. She turned red and quickly left.
Drive to the mainland?
I was chatting with a few friends recently about how some people on the mainland think there’s a bridge to Hawaii.
Scotty Bowman told me that in 1940, when he was six, his family traveled to Detroit to pick up a brand new car. They drove to San Francisco and shipped the car to Honolulu and sailed home.
“One evening, we ate at a diner,” said Bowman. “The guy sitting next to my dad at the counter asked if the car parked outside with Hawaii license plates was his. Dad said it was.
“Then he asked how long it took to drive from Honolulu. That’s when dad, the Kohala Sugar Company electrical engineer, became a member of the exclusive Bull Lia Club.
“He said, ‘The 2,400-mile trip took us six days, but that depends on how fast you drive. We spent nights in the hotels, ate in the restaurants and refueled at the gas stations built on the bridge.’
“I wonder how many people the fellow later told about this bridge to Hawaii?”
Hindi?
Bryant Ching said, “When I moved to Corvallis, Ore., in 1963, I spoke fluent pidgin. The first people I had contact with thought I was from a foreign country, like India, and tried to speak Hindi to me!
“In the summer, when I came back to Honolulu, I called my friend’s house and they didn’t know it was me. The way I spoke had changed. They later said, ‘Some haole guy called and wants to talk to you!’”
For put inside
Willson Moore said, “I was once in the Hawaiian Airlines lounge when a local guy with a sheet of paper in his hand approached the lady behind the desk.
“I overheard him ask her: ‘Can give me wan stuff for put inside?’ Without hesitation, she handed him what he wanted: an envelope!”
Ben Hur
This year, Rearview Mirror also looked at some odd and funny names. Here were some examples.
Dr. Richard Lee-Ching said he knew a doctor from South Korea who came to Hilo in the late 1960s. His last name was Hur.
“As a foreign medical school graduate, he needed first to do an American internship and learn English,” said Lee-Ching. “He wound up in the American South. His colleagues, fellow residents and nurses had a hard time remembering his name and asked if they could call him ‘Ben.’
“He agreed, not knowing anything about the movie ‘Ben Hur,’ which won 11 Academy Awards. The doctor was not built anything like its star, Charlton Heston. He was slim, about 5’-6”, with glasses and very soft spoken. He got used to Ben Hur and even changed his name formally.”
Moo
Reader Arnold Lum shared an interesting name. “My classmate’s auntie’s name was Minnie Moo,” he said.
“Auntie Minnie married Walter Kau, a piano teacher. So, she became Minnie Moo Kau.”
Normally you?
Flo Ohnishi said, “In the late 1960s, my friends and I were having dinner at a restaurant in Greenwich Village, N.Y., when I noticed the staff staring at our table.
“Being the only Asian in the group, I was used to that. As we were getting our coats on to leave, they finally came up to me and asked, ‘Are you normally you?’
“I looked up at them with a confused look, so they said, ‘She used to work here. Her name was Norma Lee Yu!’”
Fanny Goo
Many residents of Hilo had a Mrs. Fanny Goo as their teacher. Fanny Tam married Paul Goo, who worked for Amfac. The two were noteworthy golfers.
Lee Cataluna had written about funny names in Hawaii. On her list was Pua Ting, Harry Legg, Dr. Yee Ha and Crystal Chanda Lear.
The Honolulu Advertiser wrote in 1969 about eight Tai sisters named after the musical scale: Dodo, Rere, Mimi, Fafa, Soso, Lala, Sisi and Octavia.
Chew Gum
Alvin Yee said, “Mr. Chew Gum was a prominent businessman in Honolulu’s Chinatown in the late 1800s and early 1900s. He was the founder of several Chinatown organizations which still exist today, including the See Yup Benevolent Society, of which I have been a member since birth.”
Cummings and Goings
Guy Morgan graduated from James B. Castle High School.
“My health class teacher, Mrs. Cummings, took a leave of absence and returned a couple weeks later, newly married. Her new name was Mrs. Goings. I was very confused,” Morgan said.
“There was a band teacher there named Mr. Nichols. He and his wife were expecting a new baby daughter and I remember him joking about naming her Penny Ann Nichols.”
What was your funniest experience of 2025?
Bob Sigall is the author of the five “The Companies We Keep” books. Contact him at Sigall@Yahoo.com or sign up for his free email newsletter at RearviewMirrorInsider.com.
